In less than three hours,I will either be doomed or saved. But really,either option will still lead to the same outcome. And I would rather get over my suffering sooner than later,shorter than longer. I really hope that I won't break down and cry later. lol. I tend to lose control over my emotions at such events. Especially when the results aren't the desired one. My english is really bad in here. Pardon me. I can't think straight and my fingers are totally shaking. I am typing all these down only because I need something to do. Maybe I will go practise my piano a little. I just can't sit still and wait for the impending doom.

The year has barely started and I have already suffered two disappointments. I really hope that douple won't turn triple. I don't think my heart can take that many trips down to my feet. I have been practising,you know. The feeling of my heart sinking down. In hopes that I won't cry too badly in front of everyone later. Sometimes,I find myself wondering if I have really tried my best at the Olevel examinations. I know I went through all the motions of preparing for this major exam,but was my heart really in it? Did I really do all I can? Because whenever I think about how I have done for each subject,all those that I have done wrongly came back to haunt me. And I am left feeling that I have thoroughly failed that subject. These self-doubt sessions have became more regular in the past few days,leaving me very insecure and doubtful of achieving the grades I want.

People often say that if you have enough will,you can do it. Since the exams are already over,can I will my results to be the desired grades? Haha. Okay,I am going out of my mind with worry. Anxiety. Fear. Whatever. But I really don't think I can stand disappointing everyone I love. I am afraid my mind just wouldn't accept what my heart is telling me. By blocking out the whispers of my heart,I am left doing whatever I feel is logical,practical and sometimes foolish stuff.

'Kay. What am I talking about. I don't know. I think I will just go practise my piano a little,eat whatever lunch I can get down my throat and prepare for school.